The phone rings and a young woman's voice is there with her accent rather obvious. She says her name is Alice and she is offering ten day's accommodation anywhere in Australia or New Zealand. We talk more, wasting her time, then I ask if they will pay the travel to New Zealand. She pauses - that's not on her paper - and I add, maybe I will swim there or go by patipati (outboard). She is silent then says, we are only offering accommodation. So I add - maybe my patipati geer jau (drown) - something I once heard in a Fijian joke when someone was telling a story to visiting Queen Elizabeth and a guy from Labasa was telling the Queen the problems of his outboard boat, mixing up English, Fijian and Hindi. Okay, I then said to 'Alice' oh bahut dhanyabad bhaini, (thanks very much sister) and I hung up. Okay, these young men and women from the call centres do want a job, but really we are tired of the calls day after day, mostly about 6 or 7 p.m.